A few more minutes and I will have to book in. Just hate the feeling of booking in. The feeling of leaving so many people that you love behind. The feeling of sadness multiply... what if something happens to me in camp training and I will never get up again? Besides my parents and family, who else will bother?

Just feeling sad since yesterday, but I know that God will raise me up on eagle's wings. I played the song On Eagle's Wings for mass today, and somehow, I felt something, the song touched me in a way (again). The song is really beautiful today, not because I played the song, but it has a special meaning to me. I wont be back next week due to field camp and this is the time when I will be disconnected from the rest of the world.

All the best to those who are having their NUS interview this week. :)

Take care and farewell to my friends and family whom I care so much. Will update 2 weeeks from now, provided if I am alive.

Easter Virgil

Audrey played well for mass today. Her hands were cold before the mass. and she was asking me to pray for her 'Easter Alleluia' to go fine one week ago. Haha, but I know the Holy Spirit is with her anointing her hands today and she survived the entire 4 hr of mass. Of course, I am happy for her that she did her first high mass after 1 month in the choir. God has blessed you in his own way, girl! :) and of course a helpful guy here sitting beside you, helping you with technical stuff, ensuring that the settings in the electone is correct, and helping you to improvise as well, helping you to page turn, where got such stupid and silly guy doing so many things???

Another news to be slightly happy about is that she is going to shift to other place in Singapore 2 years later, after means after I ORD. Save me the hassle of worrying who to take over her place after a year (even though I have someone in mind to take over). Of course, I really hope that Audrey can stay longer, and also no harm getting another organist backing and also being versatile.

Sighz, I am really sad now if you ask me. Well, I have to learn to accept to part and lose a good friend. "Such are the ups and downs in life". Maybe there is no such thing as everlasting friendship. The "friends forever", commonly overused slogan is crap. Human relationships are like this, you are friends with someone if you find yourself being able to say hi to one another, become good friends when you start to learn to understand one another, become better friends when you learn to accept each other faults and be frank with one another, become best friends when you find yourself beign able to share your darkest secrets with one another, being able to share woes and joy, but then after breaking communications with one another, friendship will start to detoriate and everything is back to square.

I dare not think what will happen 2 years later. Anything can happen within these two years. And come on, will still be in Singapore la, only no more seeing each other in the same church only right? I hope i can be someone who is heartless, no emotions, someone who doesnt take friendship too seriously so that I can be free of any disappointments in life and also not get too emotional. Maybe I treasure true friendship more.

Sighz, i should just treasure this short
2 years. Whatever will be will be, and I believe that God has a plan for us and He will lead us to the right path all our life. :)

Good Friday!

A day that is indeed good.

Wake up in the morning. Joined the choir for practice for 12.30pm service. This is something that keeps me motivated. No, i wasnt at the keyboard. :)

Played the organ for the children's liturgy at 3pm. The kids are cute. Watch the passion play acted by the children and followed by a short screening of Narnia, the part where the lion was killed.

Went for the Stations of the Cross at 7.30pm. Something struck me during the way of the cross.

A prayer which struck me:

I beg you Lord, to help me in accepting the partings that must come, friends going away, children leaving home etc.

This statement makes me reflect on my life. About how many of my true friends that come and go. I remembered my first best friend, (i remembered his name is Alvin Tan, a catholic like me too... was in the same nursery, kindergarden class as me in PAP Tampines East, stayed in block 210+ [216, tampines st. 21 if I didnt remember wrongly, I remembered I bought u a new pencil box for your birthday present when u invited me to your birthday party] but parted after he shifted house to other part of Singapore, remembered that his parents got divorced just after we parted). If you managed to read my blog, please leave a message. But i guess chances are slim, i dont even remember how you look like and how you are now.

I guess many of our relationships are like that. Friendship will detoriate if we do not keep in touch with one another for a long time, from a best friend to a total stranger. Unless you are talking about someone extremely special... and many times I feel sad about it.

Is friendship supposed to be treasured? Maybe a person with no siblings at all treasure friendship more than those with siblings, but his greatest weakness is keeping in touch with his friends unless he has the charisma. Chances of feeling lonely is high but got to learn to get used to it.

To Be continued...

Though I am not a strong supporter of National Service, these are somethings which I have learnt in my 4 weeks of NS:

1) If you dont push yourself, you wont improve. Here are some examples:


1st Ippt test:

2.4 km run: 14 min 30 sec

1st 2.4km cat test: (after a few days): 11 min 51 sec

2nd ippt test 2.4 km run: < 11 min 30 sec

Chin up 0 to 1

Standing Broad Jump: 198cm to 208 cm to 216 cm

Shuttle Run: 10.8 sec to 10.7 s to 10. 6 s to 10.5 s

Sit ups: from 33 to 42

Many times, our body will fail us, but remember to keep mentally strong. "Mind over body" Our body tends to give up easily, but in this situation, we have to depend on our mind. Many of the times, I give up whenever i fall or I am tired. This applies to many areas in my life, be it in music, relationships. In this way, we will never improve. But sometimes we do need motivation, a lasting motivation... only through pain, we can become stronger.

This shows that if i want to, I can do it.

Anyway, something great happened on wednesday. Well, let's say, something which i thought it was hopeless miraculously survived. To that person, if u are reading my blog, who sent me a belated happy birthday sms (u know who u are): although it's very late, it is certainly my best birthday present. It is always good to reconcile with a friend after months of cold war.

Well, somethings which I dont believe:

"Shag is for pussy" --> come on... this is what some sergants say. BUt then, not everyone has the same fitness level. It's normal to feel shag after a day of exercise. It's only when u give up easily, then probably u are a pussy...

Many things have happened in NS this week, however, I must say, God has been protecting me throughout this week:

1) Got Guard duty on wednesday night
2) 2 4km route marches.

In these major activies, God has really protected me in his own ways. Let me explain to you why.

Guard Duty on Wednesday night- thurs morning:

That night, we (the guards on duty) had our dinner first. We had chicken spaghetti for dinner, (same for the rest). HOwever, many of my platoon mates and company mates (who were not sent for guard duty) got food poisoned that night. Many of them end up having diarroea in the next morning. My company has a high number of casualties. Out of 48 ppl, 20 ppl got food poisoned.

God has indeed protected me from getting diarroea that night by sending me for guard duty. If I were not send for guard duty, I might be food poisoned as well. You might say, getting diarroea is good, however, those that got diarroea arent spared when we were doing our physical training. While the 'fighting-fit' people get to train, the sick ppl has to do 'honourable duties' such as cleaning the area, sweeping the floor. So would you prefer to do guard duty (when u really can get to miss a day of activities and sleep for 8 hours (usually 7 hours of sleep) or doing area cleaning, sleep 7 hours and also the hassle of going to the toilet 4 to 8 times a day???

Route march yesterday:

There was a thunderstorm when we arrived at our company line after a streneous and tiring 4 km route march (actually, the actual distance is 6.2 km according to some sources). However, we were not evacuated immediately to the shelter unlike other platoons. We were forced to medataki (marching on the spot) in the heavy downpour with lightning and thunder by both our platoon officer (or platoon commander) and sergant. (is this the right way to train or are they 'torturing' soldiers???). However, help come along the way when our company sergant-major ask us to stop and immediately evacuated us to the foyer. If we continued marching in the rain and thunderstorm, many of us would fall sick.

Some of us were pissed by the treatment of our PC and that sergant. But remember, God is great, no matter how high their rank will be.