Sometimes i know there is a strong temptation in me, to think what I am not suppose to think and not get too sensitive and start assuming things.

If there is a battle over a particular thing, I will be the loser.
If things are not yours, just let it go, although how much u love it.
What yours is yours, what is not yours will not be yours. Forcing it will make you lose everything.

I am the voluntary party to get into this deep mess, assuming things without concrete evidence (yet). Maybe he does like her, maybe he just wants to be friends with her. Whether it's the fact that he likes her or just friends, reveal it to me Lord, dont make me think so much. If it's the former, comfort me Lord. Dont let the evil one triumph. Whatever it is, it's really none of my business. Why do I feel this way?

There are ocassions when I know I am not needed anymore. I am happy for her, but it's a mixture of happy and bitter. Loving someone/ something is a sin or a cause of sin, especially emotions of jealousy, bitterness.

Psalm 25 (some selected verses)

"To you, O Lord, I offer my prayer; in you, My God, I trust. Save me from the shame of defeat: don't let my enemies gloat over me! Defeat does not come to those who trust in you. but to those who are quick to rebel against you. Teach me your ways, O Lord; make them known to me... Remember, O Lord, you kindness and constant love which you have shown from long ago. Forgive the sins and errors of my youth.. Turn to me, Lord, and be merciful to me, because I am lonely and weak. Relieve me of my worries and save me from all my troubles. Consider my distress and suffering and forgive all my sins..."

This is the advent responserial Psalms which my church uses. and the response for this is
"To you, O Lord, I lift up my Soul, Come O Lord and Set us Free." (using the melody of "O Come O Come Emmanuel")

This is what i am feeling now. When I am in doubt, I do really need answers to free me from thinking too much. I know these feelings are unnecessary, normal but wrong!